grrrrr’bage

This post is a direct re-production of Sam Brueghel’s A POOL of MASCARA.

Menurut kata i. Sometimes, i wonder why i wonder so much. Its like i tend to think to much when doing something, or take a blu-ray worth of time deciding on stuffs. But let me get to something here, so that it seems like i’m writing something worthwhile.

There is this sudden feeling for me to start writing a new post after a long time, merely because i miss typing. Its been quite a while since my nail slept with my keys. Its weird. No. REallY. Don’t give that stupid look you twerp. Yeah, you. What? You think I’m talking about someone else? No, i aint aiming this at someone else, i don’t know who might be reading what i just wrote, but whoever you are, i just called you a sucked-up twerp.
Okay, i needed a break or something, so i decided to type this whole shit up. Keep this between me and you,-this post seriously contains nothing, and its just a way of enveloping you with a blank feeling of pure dumbness, having known that you took the time to actually read it.
Is there anything wrong lately? Let me think. Its been 2 months, or maybe just 1 and a half, or maybe 2 and a half, or maybe , i just don’t give a damn how many months it is; but I’ve been going through this strange feeling. I feel like I’m floating, in a world of strangers, while I’m being surrounded by familiar people. I’m not sure if i’m going through a normal process. And for the last time , its not love, u stupid romantics-get a life. I’ve been just observing or perhaps, gazing or -lets just say- staring, at a lot of abnormalities.
Its insanely disturbing. I’ve tried reporting this case to my colleagues and  teachers(yes .i have teachers. no. they’re not qualified to teach others). Part of the reason why its disturbing, is that its hard to explain. I’m being possessed with thoughts of global warming ; getting closer as i watch the eyes of my female peers. They’re a "something". Its not a word, nor is it what my mom taught me. I don’t really know. A lack of sleep, i suppose. Or perhaps a signal of belonging to a certain tribe ‘ala  LORD OF THE FLIES style. I wake up late at night, feeling soaked [in sweat], but i wasn’t having a nightmare ( Jessica Alba aint a nightmare). I was terrified of that vilified eye. That look.Like a black dagger  slicing a  few circles  on my  chest  in the pattern of a dart-board and then like a professional dart-king striking one into my buttocks.
They’re cruel, and magical-not in a david copperfield way, but more in a david blaine way. U get what I’m trying to say? I’m saying lines. I pods. NO shit !! i-lines. Its a "something".. I don’t know the word. I just don’t know. THey make me frightened to bed, and i sleep when i’m on the bed, but i can’t. The black fury that i see, made me go to bed, but the darkness i find by closing my eyes reminds me of that black circle and awakens me.

Its sort of an awakening in reality too. You realize that they’re trying to make a statement through those eye-sun-visors. Its like; move aside people, sweet lissy is dead, and here is the bad batch.[pun]. I don’t know if its a trend, because trends are supposed to look nice, right? This seems more sloppy than trendy.
The applying of [that black dye] is actually attractive -in a way- but splashing it insanely , makes it seem scary. Imagine looking at someone who has lost sleep for a few days, with eye-bags,lazy-eye,and dark circles- only to find out that its actually a decorative accessory.

I still don’t know what to say about this. I’m still recovering from too many shocking revelations, and i have a stinking feeling that curiosity is my godword, the same way dolphins will do anything to fool you into believing that they are smart.

My cousin sister recently told me freaky news. Whats a freak news? Its sort of like a shocking news, but more like the type you never ever really imagine facing. A shocking new is like "Dude, Diana passed away". Its shocking in a way like- you know that babe will die some day, but you’re surprised that she died today, so its kinda shocking.

But a freaky news is more like "Elton John married his gay partner this afternoon". Now that , i say is freaking news. Its complicated. No disrespect to gays, but first we try to get past that near-death shock of actually learning that Elton John is gay.[I thought gay guys are good looking. Hmm], then u have to re-digest the new-found info regarding an all sex marriage.

So there is this new stuff regarding Sidney Sheldon. Some famous writer, i suppose whom girls love to brag about. Okay, enough with that. What i’m trying to say is i recently learned that she is a guy !! What? Do you know how freaked i was? I finally found out what and how goose-bumps look like?? I’ve been having nightmares again, mommy!! She is a guy. No wait. He is a guy. How did she-emm, he, turn out to be a guy? I don’t really know much about him, but he apparently has a name that sounds like that of a girl’s. Is it one of those corny things writers like to do? They playfully put girly names so as to attract more male actors, who’ll read their stories while imagining how she would look like, only to learn that the she is a he, and the goose-bumps, and nightmares, and boom.

Some researchers have even posited that the series may not have been
the work of a single murderer, but of an unknown number of killers
acting independently. - Marion Palmer [biop]