grrrrr’bage

It stands there doing nothing. Nothing at all. Couldn’t even tell if its siting or standing but it definitely serves a purpose. As clean and white as teeth in a toothpaste ad and yet seemingly impenetrable.
   Japanese comics have been a favorite in almost any non-asian country like malaysia. The same goes here with me too. The amazing attention to detail and engrossing story lines make japanese writers seem like the human dolphins. Pretenders. The intensity by which the stories are told, are so intense, so much so that i’m using the "so" word so [expletive]ing many times.
    When i was a young blood carrying bag of skin, another out of the world thing that caught my vivid imaginations-apart from manga- was the photo studio. It was merely a place for printing high quality images of snapshots of people (and stuffs), and remains a  testament to why  not everyone can become a model. Despite all this, a trip to any local photo studio gave me the perception that i was somehow going to some glamorous movie studio- maybe Universal or Warner or any other shit that makes clamor seem glamorous.
As i my phase changed from girlish kid to mature adult, i started to dislike taking photos. I was not photogenic, and neither my face nor the camera could get into an agreement for a good timely shot.
As god would have it, i despised a good many things in life. But nothing gave me the chills like sitting on the bright blue cushioned stool during photo shoots in photo studios.
   It was awkward, and i never had a good understanding with the photo taker. Either I leaned too much there or here, or smiled a little too much or was being to mundane or was looking at the other cameras, or couldn’t stand the bright flashes. Whatever it was, i really-genuinely felt that all of this somehow had something to do with that blue stool. Not the color or the cushion (deffinitely no), it was the sitting position. The smell of burning silver halide from the film rolls, plus that annoying smell of brown glue, all added up to give the awkwardly sitting me a deja-vu sort of feeling.
It was a feeling that brought me back to a time years (light years) ago, and also manages to remind me of yesterday, or last saturday, and the midnight of thursday(oh yeah).

    The minute i lay my buttocks on those luscious blue high rise comforters, i’m immediately dragged into another dimension. Everything seems white, and one gets the notion that he/she is in some sort of Matrix like white background-computer graphic imagery ( [expletive]ing movies ). A quick glance overhead reveals why premature judgments are as good as the Malaysian judiciary. The cream coloured asbestos coated ceiling, way above means that i’m trapped inside some kind of chamber. The circular walls, with a glossy finish gives me an impression like i’m about to go through some sort of interrogation session.

   I don’t know if the white surrounding is the cause of it or if the lights are too strong, but my vision seems somehow blurred, and a tingling sensation starts in the inner corners of my eye lid the minute i start blinking excessively.

    The eye "thingy" reminds of the time when i was made to stand under the sun without moving for a few hours while listening to the day-care speech my principle  gives during school sports days. The intensity of the heat and the humidity we lucky Malaysians have makes my breathing deeper and more shallow, and in turn causes me to lose whatever concentration i had on the ceremony.

    Breathing getting shallow. A [expletive]ing funny idea that is. Thats when i realised. Breath!  Air! Where? I wasn’t breathing !! Where was the [expletive]ing air. My palms where wrinkled. Shit ! I’m in some sort of liquid. Probably water. But it tasted a little sour, not salty sour, but more of a pickle like mild sour with a very obscene after taste.

Am i in some kind of Alice in Wonderbread thing. I sure didn’t feel like i was, but everything was turning stranger and stranger. The lights went off. It didn’t go off like  boom-gone. It was more off; like a fading-out thing. Everything got dimmer and dimmer, and suddenly, all the gloss and white wasn’t anywhere to be seen. There was this gleaming moon-like sparkle;no, no, more like a star-only a little bit larger, then the ones  you see in the night sky.

  The light that seeped in from above in that darkness formed a curved W. It had no meaning whatsoever, until.Until i saw the mothership. Holy shit, it was large. In the middle of it was a an opening. It was circular, but closed, with lines that seemed to spread out of the opening. There were this wire like tentacles, micro-tentacles standing stagnant and weak-looking from some of the lines.

   The light then started to fade slightly, and all of sudden, reality struck me hard and dry.  Everything made sense now. This wasn’t some sort of alien abduction story. It wasn’t even a mother[expletive]ing ship. It was what that paralyzed-wheel-chair driving, nurse [expletive]ing scientist had always yapped about. It was a black hole. The cosmic marvel.In front of my very eyes. It explained the dimming light. They were being sucked by the overwhelming gravity it held, the lines, were actually cracks signaling its age, maybe that of the universe. Two blobs stood in an inter-connecting way around the hole. Probably some sort of material reaction to the gravity pull.

  There was a sudden thunderous sound. it was deafening and sounded worser than a Harris Jeyraj song. It was more obscene than any curse word. Suddenly i was engulfed in the evilness of the sub-galactic creation. The smell was more than what mamak stall cookings had prepared me for. I was going to collapse. I was sure about that.

   I thought i was prepared for the worse when the smell died. Then the unexpected happened. An already confusing fiction-like read, turned even more insane. The black hole was going through its last stage; i suppose. It started to shrink, with the cracks that signaled its age, growing(multiplying). Unable to withstand its own wrongdoings (sucking everything), it was starting to crash under its own strain of maddening gravitational pull.

The sight of it, was unbearable. I had seen worser things in Vijaykanth’s Narasimma, but this was making the word "worser" seem like red riding hood catching her granny inside the big bad wolf in a very very naughty way (very).

    The hole (suction hole) then stopped. It had reached its limit, i think. No. It returned  to its normal position. It didn’t just return, it started to come at me. not at lightning speed. It was slow-moving a millimetre at every blink i made. It then gloated, and suddenly seem to be holding something that was about to come out. Something terrible. What the [expletive] was this? Was it really a black hole, or some kind of mother ship?

   The black hole+mother ship, then popped. The crack lines appeared to have lessen and disappeared. It had grown younger. Then its protege came popping out. The intense brain-draining smell that it let out earlier came back, only a little more stronger, and a little more haunting. It wasn’t just the smell that i had to face. Its child was  coming out, and it was going to drop it. I saw its head coming out, and it was faceless. Then, as the "thing" slowly crept out, the mother ship started to shrink. It seemed unable to hold the thing at its opening that long. The sudden shrinking of the opening of the mother hole ship gave out a cutting sound, and i swear i could hear that thing scream in pain, as its mother gave up on it. It started falling. Holy crap.It was falling on me. The light started to grow brighter again.

   I think i managed to have withstand all of it, as the growing brightness of the light seemed to signal the mother ship’s struggle to gain control. It was losing this battle, and it was succumbing to the pressure it built. The light was good in more than one way. It helped me get a millisecond of a glimpse on the mothership’s child, just before it lands beside me in its fall from grace moment. Then. Then

Then everything turned into a Jerry Springer show when the light shed some light on the "thing". It was brown, it was like a torpedo. A not so perfect torpedo. It had bulges and bumps in certain areas, and had some dark spots along with a few lighter coloured browns, and some other colours that belonged in its genre. Yellow too, i think so. The cylindrical frame of the thing contained a few cracks, despite its moist body, and a curving crack at its tip gave it a smiling face. Smiling probably because it knew that i knew what it was. Thinking that this indian [expletive]er finally found out how he got duped into sitting and staring at it without even understanding what it was.

The smell was too strong by now. It was part of me. A sign that it was too late. As the thing hits the surface and gives out its trademark splash sound, i would realise why it was me and why the white chamber was here and why It stands there doing nothing. Nothing at all. Couldn’t even tell if its sitting or standing but it definitely serves a purpose. As clean and white as teeth in a toothpaste ad and yet seemingly impenetrable.

There really was nothing one could do in a situation like this. the smell, was very familiar, and interesting. It was a stench that signaled something you don’t want to talk about. Something thats been happening from the day you were born to even yesterday. It was green the first time, but started turning brown once i started consuming meat. The smell came with it. Its distinctive torpedo shaped body signaled good health, and asteroid like droppings signaled a lack of liquid, while a splurge of chocolaty tsunami meant a bad choice of food.

Splash!!
the camera dude calls me again, i finally hear him. And he tells me to stop day-dreaming like some [expletive]ing shit and start posing.

pOyO

This entry was posted on Wednesday, May 7th, 2008 at 9:30 pm and is filed under Science. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.